It’s sometimes said that Proverbs has a bumper-sticker theology, which may be an insult or a compliment. It may suggest brief, pithy insights, or brief, pithy oversimplifications. Either way, bumper-sticker statements can be clever, confrontational, and humorous, though also serious. They are based on human insight or human experience, and they are thus contextual, culturally-rooted, and possibly puzzling to someone from another culture. Clever, confrontational, humorous, and those other descriptions do also apply to Proverbs. How do its aphorisms compare with bumper stickers? In this paper, I focus on the great central section of the book, Proverbs 10:1–22:16, where aphorisms are most consistently concentrated. I first consider a number of characteristics common to some bumper stickers and some aphorisms in Proverbs. Second, I consider how the aphorisms differ rhetorically from the bumper stickers. And third, I note two key distinctive theological features of the aphorisms.